Didn’t I tell you the last time I summoned you here to Isfahan, to the news division of the Ministry of Intelligence, that you have no right to write about Saeed Zeinali? Didn’t I tell you that writing about Saeed Zeinali is our red line?
These were the words of my interrogator.
When? Winter 1394 [December 2015 – March 2016].
But who is Saeed Zeinali, and what is the story?
On the 18th of Tir 1378 [July 9, 1999], the protests in Tehran ignited from the University dormitories. It took about a week for the leader, with the help of the police, the Revolutionary Guards, and the Ministry of Intelligence, to suppress these protests.
Now, it was the turn for the arrest of the students and people who participated in the protests against the leadership.
On the 23rd of Tir 1378 [July 14, 1999], around 4 in the afternoon, Saeed, a 22-year-old student living in the Punak neighborhood of Tehran, was resting in his room. Besides him, his mother and grandmother were also at home.
The apartment bell rings; the door opens. Officers enter with walkie-talkies and handcuffs. Without any explanation, they ask, where is Saeed? Saeed gets up hastily.
— Saeed, put on your clothes; you must come with us.
The mother doesn’t know what has happened! Did Saeed get into a fight with someone?
The grandmother pleads with them. I am a descendant of the Prophet, I swear you to my ancestor, please do not take Saeed.
— Saeed must come with us. We will interrogate him for 10 minutes. He will return soon.
After three months, Saeed calls from prison. He says, follow up on my case.
Akram, Saeed’s mother, along with Hashem, Saeed’s father, went wherever they could, only to be told, we do not know Saeed Zeinali.
Where really is Saeed? Did he vanish into thin air?
Saeed’s father says, whenever we approached any official, they would say, is it possible for a young man to be arrested and no one be accountable?! We will follow up, come back tomorrow so we can give you the result.
I don’t know why after that day, those officials hid from us, and they didn’t answer our calls!
Did the officers kill Saeed under torture and are now evading the truth?
Is the possible murder of Saeed Zeinali, Sattar Beheshti, and the chain murders carried out under the leader’s orders, or are the perpetrators the same autonomous forces the leader talks about?
If they have killed Saeed Zeinali, what have they done with his body?
These days, when I watch the news about Khashoggi on TV, I ask myself, is it really possible that the officers killed Saeed and dismembered his body with a saw?
Did they destroy Saeed’s body with acid?
Did they hide Saeed’s body in the forests around Tehran?
Did they bury Saeed’s body in the mass graves of Khavaran?
Dear friends, today I wrote about Saeed’s death for you, but can anyone tell this to Mrs. Akram Neqabi, Saeed’s mother?
She holds Saeed’s photo and writes underneath it, “Where is my Saeed?” and waits for Saeed at the gates of Evin Prison.
Security forces have repeatedly arrested Saeed’s mother, father, and sister, holding them in solitary confinement for months and threatening them, saying you have other children besides Saeed!! So that they would stop pursuing Saeed’s fate.
Can Saeed’s mother, father, or sister ever forget their dear beloved?
Saeed’s mother says that recently one of the officers asked me, do you really tell the truth and have a son named Saeed?
Akram is sure she has a son named Saeed. She gave birth to Saeed, nurtured Saeed, raised him. She planned for Saeed’s marriage.
Maybe I’ll choose one of the family’s girls for Saeed. Maybe Saeed won’t agree. Maybe Saeed wants to marry one of the university girls. Anything he desires.
Akram hopes that one day her Saeed will return. She closes her eyes and thinks about her dearest.
Today, Saeed rings the doorbell. I open the door for him. I embrace my son. I kiss him. I smell him. He says, Mom, you’ve aged so much! I say, my son, 20 years have passed since they arrested you. I aged in that first year. Oh, what am I saying? I aged in the first month. To be honest, I aged the moment the officers stormed into our house and took you away, I aged in that exact moment.
Dear friend, esteemed reader, in your opinion, where is Saeed Zeinali? Who knows of Saeed’s fate? Does the leader know of Saeed’s fate?
Will I, who do not adhere to the Revolutionary Guards’, Intelligence’s, and the leadership’s red lines and write these for you from inside the prison, face the same fate as Saeed Zeinali, Sattar Beheshti, and Jamal Khashoggi?
God knows best,
Mohammad Mahdavifar
Isfahan Central Prison
20 Azar 97 [December 11, 2018]