▪️ In June 2014, I was at the Isfahan Martyrs’ Cemetery, accompanied by Nourizad. They arrested me and sent Nourizad back to Tehran. The next day, the duty judge released me with a pay stub, which a war veteran provided for me.
The threats and harassment had started and seemed endless. Complaint after complaint. My poem “Alphabet” opened the doors of the court to me. Advisements had no effect on me. The tempting offers of money for my silence from the intelligence were alluring.
On 29 Shahrivar 1395 [September 19, 2016], I was arrested at home and transferred to the solitary cells of the Isfahan intelligence. I spent 45 days there. My cell was in a dark, damp, dirty, and small basement. I was cut off from my family. The interrogations were harsh and lengthy. I was released on bail.
On 6 Khordad 1396 [May 27, 2017], I was arrested on Ameli Street in Aran and Bidgol. This time, I was in Kashan Prison, initially for 19 days in the public ward. I wrote and published my twenty-eighth letter to the leader from there. Because of that letter, they transferred me from the public ward to a cell. When I entered the cell, I looked at the walls for a moment and said to myself, can anyone endure here for a few hours? I endured in that cell for 138 days. My connection to the outside world was cut. On 8 Aban 1396 [October 30, 2017], I was released on bail.
My mother begs me not to write another letter to Khamenei. She says she can no longer bear it, and I promise her.
My mother realized that I had broken my promise and had written another letter to the leader. She had a stroke out of grief for me and passed away.
On Thursday, 7 Dey 1396 [December 28, 2017], just two months after being released from prison, the people’s uprising began in Mashhad and spread to a hundred cities across the country. On Saturday, 9 Dey [December 30, 2017], the uprising flared up. I woke up in the morning, waited for the kids to go to school, and told my wife that the intelligence agents would move to arrest me today to control the uprising. I took a small suitcase with a few pieces of clothing and fled the house. I intentionally left my motorcycle at the door, left my phone on at home so they would be sure I was at home, but I took my tablet with me.
My guess was right. They broke into our house over the wall at midnight. They searched everywhere, but I wasn’t at home. Two weeks later, they found me in Mashhad. I was interrogated for three days at Mashhad intelligence. They transferred me to Isfahan by plane with two intelligence officers.
I was in the Isfahan intelligence cells for ninety days. The interrogations were over. They moved me to the public ward. I spent eleven months in the public ward.
On 18 Esfand 1397 [March 9, 2019], I was exiled from Isfahan’s Dastgerd Prison with an officer and a soldier by car to Rask County in Baluchestan.
On 1 Tir 1398 [June 22, 2019], I took leave and came from Baluchestan to Aran and Bidgol to see my family.
On 22 Tir 1398 [July 13, 2019], with one day remaining of my leave, I was arrested for signing the statement of the 14 calling for Khamenei’s resignation. They did not put me in the public ward. I was in a cell for 8 months and ten days, without sunlight, phone, books, newspapers, pen, and paper. Several times, I was close to being killed by dangerous and mentally unstable cellmates.
A day before the new year. There’s no news of leave or the public ward. Just a cell, cell, and again cell. But I’m not despairing. At the last moment, at night, the cell door opened. Due to COVID-19, I have a one-week leave. I extended it for another week. The prosecutor called. I must return to prison.
I decided to go into hiding and find an opportunity to leave the country. My son says, don’t go, Dad, I’m afraid you’ll get caught like last time. Your charge will be more severe this time. I said I had no choice; if I return to prison, they won’t put me in the public ward; they’ll send me back to the cell. I’ve gotten used to the hardships of the cell, but with the dangerous and mentally unstable cellmates, my life is in danger.
On 17 Farvardin 1399 [April 5, 2020], I bid farewell to my wife and children. I lived in hiding for a hundred days. During these hundred days, the agents attacked my house three times. They arrested, interrogated, and threatened my wife, who is the sister of a martyr; they took her phone and never returned it. They arrested and severely tortured my 18-year-old son at the intelligence office. He was a top student at the Sharif University of Technology. They were innocent.
Finally, I fled the country I had risked my life for as a teenager to protect every inch of its soil.
There was no choice; I had to leave. I will go, but I will return with the message of freedom. I will certainly return. One day you’ll open your eyes, and I’ll bring baskets full of colorful flowers as a gift for you, and you’ll smile at me from the depths of your heart, and tears of joy will flow down your cheeks. You want to wipe your tears. I’ll tell you I love you with those tears.